One of the first questions people ask when they find out I’m pregnant is, “So, what’s your due date?” My response isn’t a precise time as to when the little one will be joining us. Instead, I like to leave it with a vague, “The beginning of February.” That usually creates a pause in the conversation before they start telling us all the February birthdays they know. If you want to get technical, my due date is at the very end of January, but I’ve learned a few things since having two kids and one of those is that a due date is better expressed in vague terms. According to my history, a due month is the more appropriate way to anticipate their arrival.
You see, I was 10 days “overdue” with my first before he decided to enter the world. Honestly, I was completely okay with him taking his time. He didn’t require feedings or diaper changes and was more portable as he was. But, our friends and family were not okay with his decision to take it slow and soon we considered changing our answering machine message to say, “No, he hasn’t been born yet. We’ll let you know when he is.”
With number two, we took more of the birth month philosophy and tried not to talk up the actual due date quite as much. We dreaded having to hear “So, you’re still pregnant?” countless times. Thankfully she was a bit speedier coming only six days “post-due.” Both arrived healthy, happy and right on time for them.
So we’ll see what number three wants to do. Maybe he/she will surprise us all with an “early” arrival. Or perhaps this one will rival his/her older brother at taking his/her sweet time in joining us. Whatever happens, we’ll try to relax, enjoy a few quiet nights and let him/her choose the appropriate date.
How about you? Did your little one arrive on date or was “on month” more appropriate?
I'm so with you on this one. With my last pregnancy (2nd kid), I was told at 36 weeks -- by my MIDWIFE! -- that I would never make it to my due date because I had started to dilate and thin so much. Well guess what, I made it to and PAST my due date by one week. The mental agony that occurred over the course of 5 weeks was torture. Every appointment, more dilation. Every appointment, no baby. So, with this baby (who is "due" very soon), I announced from the get-go that we would not share a due date. Instead, we've said he or she is due in mid-August. Most people have been fine with that answer, with only a few asking for the "real" date. The vague date was more for my own psyche than for anyone else. I thought that if, from the very beginning, I didn't get wrapped around a specific date, then the last few weeks leading up to birth would be easier to manager. Well, here I am and I can say that while it has been a little easier, I'm still experiencing the "is today going to be the day??" feelings. At the same time, I'm also relishing these few fleeting moments I have with baby in the womb as I know this will be my last pregnancy.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing, Cara. I can imagine how frustrating that must've been! I experienced some pelvic pressure with #2 and was told that she could easily come early. Thankfully though my midwife didn't do any exams until my due date, so we never got into dilation, thinning, etc. The "early" talk was more of a generality. But knowing how my first son came 10 days late, I wasn't holding my breath. And it's a good thing I didn't!
ReplyDeleteCongrats on your pregnancy and best wishes! Definitely try to take it easy and relish those "few fleeting moments" of pregnancy. I always miss feeling the baby move around and I try to enjoy that as much as possible while I can.