The Importance of Time

A bit of a debate has begun to surface in our house. Jonas asked a few weeks ago, “When am I going to get to play baseball?” My response was a vague, “I don’t know.” I know that at some point our kids will get involved with sports. They were a big part of my life during school and I see value in the kids playing sports. But right now, I’m not ready to commit to a practice and game schedule. Part of that stems from the fact that I love sleeping in and I don’t want my weekends to be tampered with. But a greater part comes from the fact that Jonas is 4. He has time. And what I think he needs now is time…free time, play time, be-a-kid time, don’t-rush-him-from-here-to-there time.

As some of his friends have started taking up soccer and the like, I’ve begun to wonder if perhaps it is time for Jonas to play. But after hearing Rob Wegner’s message at Granger Community Church this weekend, I felt reinforced in my stance. He discussed how being experience rich leads to being relationally poor. Too often we try to fill our kids’ lives with experience after experience after experience. And where does that leave us? Isolated from friends, family and deep connections. After all, whom are we connecting with when we’re yelling at the kids to get their shoes on so we can make it to whatever event on time? And how many deep conversations can we have when we are frantically jetting from one place to the next?

As I listened to the message, I realized that I’ve not only been contemplating this exact thing in regards to starting our kids in extracurriculars, but also in regards to life in general. It has become increasingly more difficult to spend time with friends and family. Gatherings that used to pop up on a whim now take planning and schedule aligning weeks or even months in advance…if they happen at all. And I have to be honest, nothing wears me out more than starting a month with the realization that it is already planned and scheduled to the max. And few things disappoint me more than not being able to spend time with friends and family. We all need breathing room, down time, and the space to be able to belly laugh with an old friend from time to time. And that’s what I want to teach my kids.

To achieve that, it may mean delaying the start of sports. But what it can mean is playing together in the backyard more. It may mean he’s not at Agassi’s level of tennis by age 5 (a goal I must surrender), but it also means he will hopefully know how to stop and smell the roses. It may mean he doesn’t get a chance to experience the same variety of activities as other kids, but hopefully he will understand the importance of deep and lasting relationships. Hopefully he will learn to value time and balance in his life.

Will the kids join teams at some point? Absolutely. But for now, we’re going to chill out, toss the ball around the backyard a bit and enjoy Saturday mornings, while I still have them.